Blog #13, From Lessons of Life Book, Chapter 4.
From Fear to Courage!
As I was returning to the United Kingdom, from Cape Town, South Africa, with my mother, after her divorce from my father, in 1962, I was filled with both excitement and fear of what lay in store for me. I was seventeen years of age, and was in the process of leaving my friends, my way of life, and one of the most beautiful countries I have ever seen, not to mention the irrevocable destruction of my family. Now, I was heading for the northern hemisphere, to the country of my birth, of which I had no knowledge, and no connections other than a few family members I did not know. At times I was gripped with some kind of fear, which I later came to learn was more accurately depicted as F.E.A.R. This translates into;
F = False
E = Evidence
R = Real
FEAR = False evidence appearing real.
Unfortunately, it seems as if I was born in fear, and which remained with me for many years, until I learned what it was, what is was not, and how to release it. First of all, as described above, I began to look upon fear as false evidence appearing real. Second of all, if it wasn’t real what was it? I experimented by looking at fear from many different angles, and was encouraged to do so by that excellent book entitled, ‘Feel the fear and do it anyway.’ I could not get my mind to fully grasp the concept that there were two possibilities by which fear can exist. Either I was in fear of what might befall me, or I was in fear of the concept of fear itself. One day, I arrived at the point where I was completely fed up with the way that fear had controlled my life, and so in a fit of courage, with the intent to do battle with this unseen power, I faced my fear, only to find that it was not even there. There was nothing! There was no fear! And yet it had influenced me for so many years. I began to realise that fear is holographic in nature, whereby it appears to exist, but in reality, it does not exist at all, other than in the machinations of my mind, running amok. It was the uncontrollable ramblings of a fear ridden mind that created the problem, not the problem itself, because, to every problem there is a solution, somehow, sometime, somewhere. Therefore, I came to understand that I, and I am sure many like me, are usually in fear of the concept of fear itself, nothing more, nothing less. Indeed, prior to learning this lesson, I would indulge in all the possible permutations of how the fear was justified, rather than applying myself to the resolution of the situation. Very often, when we confront the fear, or the situation that seems to create the fear, the fear subsides, a solution becomes apparent, and we overcome the adverse circumstance, and in many situations, what appeared to be adverse, was transformed into something quite beneficial.
Again, and again, I have been presented with the understanding that perception governs our reaction to external stimuli. For instance, If there was a group of people gathering somewhere at dusk, and someone shouted a warning that there was a snake in their midst, most people would react by fleeing first, then returning to enquire, only to find the snake might have been a piece pipe, like a hose (hose pipe). Therefore, the lesson was to improve my perception, and thereby improve my life!
Another aspect of fear is the fear of death, and this is, perhaps, the most fundamental dimension of fear. As I mentioned above, I was always a fearful person, and as I, in later years, transcended fear, I also transcended the fear of death. However, it was then that I received a bonus: I lost my fear of life, of living. It seems to me therefore, the fear of death indicates a fear of life as well. Once aligned with the frequency of fear, it can permeate all aspect of living life, which was my experience, and perhaps this can apply to many others as well. This is such a fundamental, primordial feeling, that I personally feel it is up to each individual to acknowledge for themselves whether they are in fear of life and death, and then go and do something about resolving this absurd notion. All we have to do is educate ourselves, because fear thrives upon ignorance. Ignorance is the darkness, and knowledge is the light, so to speak. When I discovered, as a result of much research, what death really portends, rather than fear it, I welcomed it. This shift in attitude helped me to live my life in greater joy and acceptance, knowing that this physical existence is, in fact, only a fleeting experience in my total existence, and yes, accepting re-incarnation did also help me a lot. I have done, and still do, much research on subjects that I do not understand, and the knowledge, gleaned from a variety of sources, has in fact set me free from various forms of fear. The internet and the public library system are excellent fountains of knowledge and information. However, the only real way of triumphing over fear is to be willing to find the understanding, the knowledge, the knowing from inside oneself, and then to ‘just do it!